Talk:Keefe and Sophie/@comment-173.225.145.200-20191027212615/@comment-173.225.145.200-20191028003041

Thanks, I'm honestly scaring myself too. I've been struggling with Mental Health recently. I don't know if I have depression but I've been becoming, well depressed recently. The reason I don't know is because, well I'm arguing with myself, I'm trying to deny it, and that only makes it worse. I don't want to tell my friends and family because I'm afraid that I'd needlessly worry them. I'm developing an avid self-hate calling myself a fake, and saying I don't have these problems. I don't know what to believe any more. I can't trust myself. I don't know if I'm warping my perceptions. I can't even trust my senses, I'm starting taste lemons at certain cues, the c sound in rice (I don't know the proper term for it), when I get scared (like when I went to Haunted House last week), I'm in such a major self-arguement that I can't even trust the arguement. I don't know if I have Mental Health or not, and I dare not tell my family and friends about it until I'm sure, and possibly not even then. It's tearing me apart, I don't know what to trust when it comes to myself, and it's an endless cycle. Me screaming at myself, forcing myself through mental and real life agony. I've even started to wish for death. I'm scaring myself too, and I want to tell my family and friends, but I can't, I can't work up the courage. I don't want to burden them. I've suspected that I've have something wrong with me for a while, but now I'm even more unsure. I can't describe really how I feel, I just want to scream sometimes. I'm slamming my head into the wall when nobody else is around. I also have read the requirements for being diagnosted with PTSD and I've met all of them, but part of me, my angry side is telling me that I'm probably just warping my reality once again, I'm doing this a lot recently. I'm scared, I don't know whether I'm fine or not. Do you guys think I have a Mental Health problem, I won't go to anybody until I'm sure. After that, if I do I need to work up the courage. Please be honest with me. I know I haven't done a very good job describing what's going on, but this is as far as I dare, I don't know what I'm forcing upon myself, and what's real. Help me please.

-Keeper of the Nerd