Board Thread:Short Stories and Fanfictions/@comment-108.56.231.106-20191020224916/@comment-2600:1702:44C0:F1F0:8AB:C4BF:457D:D10C-20191024215926

Hey great first fanfic! Since you asked I have some quick advice for chapter one. Instead of starting with a weaker dialogue like "Can I come in?" you might want to start with a better hook to grab the reader's attention.