User blog:TheSavageCabbageKing/Goodreads Review of Flashback that I find oddly funny

'''Well, this series has hit a new low. Flashback removes everything that was still entertaining about this series and instead gives us endless discussions of logistics, medical treatments, and more Fitzphie than I can handle.'''

'''So. Much. Boring. Filler.'''

'''Have you ever wanted to read an extensive novel about a character in a hospital stay that details every mundane detail of their treatment? No? Me neither! And yet, early on in Flashback, Sophie and Fitz get injured and have to stay in the hospital wing (or whatever it's called in this series) at Foxfire for an extended period of time. To be specific, they spend 8hrs and 40 min of the 23hr and 9min long audiobook in the hospital. That is 37.5% of this 848 page book. 37.5% of a book late in the series not accomplishing anything. '''

'''Instead of plot progression or character development for any of the long-neglected side characters, we are graced with endless descriptions of injuries and treatments and Sophie and Fitz being disgustingly mushy. After they finally get out, we shift to endless bodyguard logistics discussions. Why?WHY?! Why waste hundreds of pages on nothing? Why not just fast forward through the hospital stay? And why are we wasting time talking about more bodyguards when we all know they won't be able to protect Sophie? She will obviously have to face the Neverseen again because plot (or lack there of). '''

'''Everyone but Sophie and Fitz get the shaft in this book. All the wonderful side characters are almost completely absent until the final fight, and in its place we get the Neverending Fitzphie Show. When anyone else is actually present, they are reduced to commenting on the love triangle. Why can't Tam, Linh, Marella, Wylie, Dex, and Biana have their own side plots and character development? Why can't we ever see Sophie interact with people who aren't love interests? Can anyone talk about anything other than who Sophie's dating? Even Keefe, the shining light of this series, is written out of most of this novel in the stupidest way.'''

'''Fitz has somehow become an even more terrible character. Fitz, who has managed to be incredibly perfect and boring this entire series, has doubled down hard on his one defining character trait: anger. This character has had some serious anger management issues since book 2, and though we saw some resurgence of it towards Keefe back during his Neverseen days, it has come back in full force in this book. And yet everyone just hand waves it away!Remember how much grief everyone gave Keefe for being reckless? None of that for perfect boy Fitz. Let's take a look at a couple excerpts, shall we?'''

'''Fitz whipped around. "So then you guys knew this was happening?"'''

'''"Fitz..." Della tried. '''

'''He shook his head, turning to Sophie and Keefe. "Did you know too? Is that why you're here?"'''

-

"If we didn't let them use Everglen, they would've found somewhere else."

'''"Fine by me!" Fitz shouted. '''

'''"I dunno," Keefe jumped in. "Wouldn't you rather be able to keep an eye on Alvar?"'''

'''Fitz reeled on him. "You're on their side? Is that why you just sat there and talked about your stupid hair?"'''

'''"Okay, first? We both know my hair is awesome," Keefe said with his hugest smirk yet. "And second: it's not like they're setting your brother free. Were you listening to Dizznee? I'm pretty sure if Alvar breathes too hard, Dex'll zap him."'''

"Don't even get me started on Dex," Fitz muttered.

'''"I know," Biana said quietly. "I can't believe he knew for a week and didn't tell us."'''

'''Sophie opened her mouth to defend Dex but swallowed back the words. She could tell Fitz and Biana weren't ready to hear them. '''

'''Fitz must've noticed, though, because he reeled toward her. "Don't tell me you're okay with this."'''

'''"'Okay' isn't the right word," she mumbled. "I think... it's a hard call."'''

'''"A hard call," Fitz repeated. "That's it? I thought for this of all things, we'd be on the same side."'''

'''"We are," Sophie promised, reaching for him. '''

'''He jerked away. "No, we're--"'''

Keefe stepped between them......

-

'''"It's killing them you know," Biana said quietly. "Knowing you're here, still recovering, and don't want to see them. I catch mom crying all the time."'''

"Good," Fitz said.

'''"Don't be like that," she told him. '''

"And don't tell me you're on their side now!"

'''Wow, what a guy. He lashes out at his parents, his sister, his supposed best friend, and even Sophie, accusing them all of withholding information and taking sides when the situation is clearly more complex than that. Sophie just forgives him as usual. Lashing out is clearly a great start to a relationship. But I guess being a cute boy makes everything ok. Except sadly, it often does in the real world. And we are supposed to like this character?'''

'''I also find it weird how often we are told Fitz and Keefe are best friends, because I cannot remember ever seeing Fitz act like it. He lashes out at Keefe a lot, and refused to give him the benefit of the doubt throughout the entirety of his time in the Neverseen. '''

'''Let's also not forget Fitz has been repeatedly pressuring Sophie to sign up for the match, and implied he wouldn't date her if she didn't because he didn't want to be in a bad match. Yeah... Can you feel the love?'''

'''Still no sign of any plot progression. I'm not even sure if the author knows where this series is supposed to go anymore. What has been the point of the last 4 books? There's a scene early on where Keefe goes over all the stuff they don't know about the Neverseen, which is basically everything. And then the author even reverses one of the Black Swan's only accomplishments of the last 4 books. [Making the caches fake was incredibly unnecessary and infuriating. What was even the point of the entire story arc of Keefe joining the Neverseen for anyway? (hide spoiler)] How can this be book 7/9 (or possibly 10 as I have recently heard)? '''

'''I'm starting to get really sick of the Neverseen outsmarting everyone. This goes way beyond your standard making-your-villains-clever-to-make-the-good-guys-underdogs stuff. The Neverseen literally know everything the good guys are going to do. Everytime. Conflict scenes are not even suspenseful anymore. Because I know the Neverseen have predicted everything that will happen and it will be revealed they manipulated Sophie and Co. the whole time and this was all part of their plan, etc., etc. Since every scene of the good guys "winning" has been reversed to be all part of the evil plan all along, what does it even matter anymore. '''

Looking back the plot of every book has basically been:

1) Sophie and Co. investigate Neverseen stuff. 

2) Obnoxious love triangle nonsense ensues.

3) All interesting side characters get to do nothing. 

4) Sophie and Co. discuss the most recently introduced convoluted plot point. 

5) Hundreds of pages of filler ensue.

6) Sophie and Co. confront the Neverseen. 

7) Everything was part of the Neverseen's plan all along because they predicted everything ever. 

8) Sophie and/or one other friend gets injured, but they all escape because plot armor.

9) We learn nothing of the Neverseen's goals. The End.

'''I'm sorry, but this is just not gonna fly anymore. We are 3/4 of the way into this series (supposedly)! This series needs to get its act together and start building towards something. Or completing character arcs. Or making an actual point. Or resolving the many unresolved mysteries. Or something. How many more books is it going to take? '''

'''So much convoluted detail! It seems like the author has gotten lost in details. Details can be great, but not at the expense of the plot. Which is weird, because despite the fact these characters talk about almost nothing but the plot, we have still gotten nowhere. Instead we have to talk about the 73rd jewelry gadget Sophie has acquired, or the endless, stupid love triangle, or a million what-ifs about the Neverseen's plans, or Sophie freaking out, or the latest addition to the mess of convolution, shadow flux. Yep. As if there weren't enough stupid random convoluted things our heroes have to deal with, something called shadow flux is introduced here, and you will hear a lot about it. Far more than you will ever hear about the Neverseen's motivations, or character development for all the side characters, or the good guys actually accomplishing something. '''

It's Spoiler Time!

'''Nothing is accomplished. What a shock. To no one's surprise, nothing of note is accomplished in Flashback, except another member of the Neverseen is conveniently killed by accident (not through our heroes' wits, of which they have none). I'm disappointed. Umber was really built up in this book, and she didn't really do much at all before being snuffed out. '''

'''Even after all Sophie talks big about this time being the time they will be prepared, and this time they will fight back, and this time they will win and blah blah, Sophie and Co. are once again outwitted by the Neverseen and get captured almost instantly. The bodyguards are once again basically useless. Sophie literally falls into every trap the Neverseen set, yet again.'''

This time, Lady Gisela beat them.

'''She beats you every time. EVERY TIME!!! Will these heroes ever be even the least bit competent? Will the plot ever progress? What is even the point of these books anymore? Is the author going for the world record on number of pages that accomplish nothing? '''

'''Alright, let's talk about Fitz again. I hate Fitz. I have always hated his character and after this book I now REALLY hate him. He does at least finally get some character development related to his anger management. Here are a few more excerpts:'''

'''Biana looked convinced, especially when Keefe told him, "He's telling the truth. I'd be able to tell if he wasn't." Fitz snorted. "Right - like you could tell with your mom." Which was a super low blow.'''

-

'''Fitz had his arm pressed to Alvar's throat. Cutting off his air supply. "TELL ME WHAT YOU WERE DOING OUT HERE!" he demanded ...... When neither of them seemed to get through to him, Sophie stepped closer, whispering in Fitz's ear, "You have to be careful of your echo."'''

-

Before Dex could answer, Fitz let out a frustrated growl and yanked the bracelet off his wrist, flinging it into the darkness as hard as he could.

-

'''But when she told Fitz that Keefe also thought he should wait, Fitz's mental voice sharpened. "Well that's convenient."'''

'''"What is?" she asked.'''

"Keefe siding with you. I wonder why he'd do that."

-

'''"There was a moment, as the cubby was filling. Alvar was pounding on the glass, shouting things. And... I looked at the panel and realized one of the buttons probably opened up a drain. And I stopped pressing things." Sophie's mouth went dry with the confession, and her insides twisted all kinds of horrible ways. But, she knew what he needed ...... "Life is a series of hard choices."'''

'''Wow there's a lot to unpack here. Fitz getting unreasonably jealous of Keefe, Fitz showing violent tendencies, Fitz showing a desire to hurt people before they do anything wrong, and yep... Fitz murdered his brother. And doesn't regret it. Real likable guy right here. '''

'''Sophie is frustratingly calm in reacting to Fitz's anger issues. These are some extreme red flags about his character. When he literally nearly murders Alvar, she's just like "oh, be careful of your echo, sweetie." She actually apologizes to him at one point. She APOLOGIZES when she did nothing wrong! This has some serious abusive relationship red flags. I am horrified that the author is not analyzing this. This is middle-grade for goodness sake. After Fitz actually murders Alvar, she just says "life choices are hard." ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! Finally, after the life choices comment she gets understandably freaked out by him and runs into Keefe's arms. But if I thought that would be the end of the horrible love triangle plot, then... well I guess I shouldn't be surprised anymore. There was a minute I thought Keefe and Sophie would discuss it. Or at least Sophie and Fitz might. But nope! After ALL THAT Sophie just carries on like nothing has changed between her and Fitz and she's still in love with him? Really? REALLY?! Are you kidding me? '''

'''Oh but PSYCH! Alvar is alive and escapes because no one dies in this series except unimportant characters. But alive or not, let's not forget Fitz did not just contemplate, but attempted to murder someone. And didn't regret it. We're not going to analyze this at all? Just right back to Fitzphie blushes and giggles? I want to vomit. '''

'''Sophie still has these random moments when she turns into a complete unlikeable character. She still gets jealous anytime Fitz and Linh are even in the same room. And then there is this scene:'''

'''Sophie glanced at Fitz, wishing they were trusting people she actually liked. But they'd lost enough time. "Okay," she said. "Let's go." Under different circumstances, Sophie might've enjoyed how much the Hekses flailed and screamed when she made them plummet into the void - or the way they landed in a heap among the grassy dunes.'''

'''Geez. Sophie apparently enjoys scaring people she doesn't like. Even though the Hekses never actually did anything except not love her like the rest of the world does.'''

'''Her obnoxious self-importance is in full view not much later as well, when she is throwing her weight around in front of all the veterinary experts, hysterically insisting they are not trying hard enough and that there must be a way to save Silveny's babies just because she wants there to be. Even though all the experts are doing all they can. Clearly the calm-mindedness one would hope for in a leader. '''

'''On an unrelated note, I was pissed Keefe wasn't present for the whole Silveny incident. He is the character who was with Sophie for all of the Silveny stuff thus far, it seems a bit unfair to not let him take part in helping her after all that, just so we can have stupid Fitzphie be alone. '''

But since nothing sad is ever permanent in this series, Tarina pulls a deus ex machina out of her butt.

'''Poor Tam. Because this series is determined to accomplish nothing and reverse any accomplishments that actually occur (ie. the fake caches reveal that destroyed Keefe's character arc), apparently we now have to watch Tam go through literally the same character arc Keefe just went through. Are you kidding me? One angsty-good-guy-joins-the-bad-guys arc is enough for a series, thank you very much. And now I'm sure we're now going to have to waste the whole of the next book to wrap up this Tam plotline.'''

'''I wanted Tam to get some of his own character development, sure, but not the same character development as Keefe! And despite all the talking to Vespera and Gisela, you'll never guess what we still don't know about.'''

"The day will come when you'll finally understand what we're truly working toward..."

'''Can that day come now? '''

'''Yep. That's right. After 7 books, SEVEN BOOKS, we still don't know what they Neverseen's plans are. *flips table*'''

The Match

'''Really? After all the pain the Match has caused Jolie and Dex's parents, Sophie just registers for the Match anyway? Just like that? Because Fitz gives you flutters, we're giving up on all our morals and any attempt to make a point with these books? '''

Random Thoughts

'''---"Keeping track of dates in the lost cities was impossible." ...Tell me about it. '''

---Best quote of this book: "Why do clothes never have enough pockets? There should always be lots of pockets."

'''---Do these elves eat anything other than sugary sweets? '''

'''---Sophie learns to throw daggers in 30 min? Really? Really?'''

---I'm getting a bit tired of how all powerful Ruy is.

---No one assumed the villains would notice them training with weapons in plain sight?

---How do the trolls keep the newborns from murdering each other?

---Isn't it pathetic that human fingerprint sensors are more secure than the stupid elves' DNA sensors that apparently open to any trace of someone's very easily stealable DNA?

'''---Marella gets shafted as expected, just like Tam, Linh, Biana, Dex, and Wylie. Despite her manifesting as a pyrokinetic being a plot development with huge potential. '''

'''---For all the powers Super Special Snowflake Sophie has, she doesn't use them much. Or effectively.'''

'''---Freaking horrible love triangle has hijacked the plot. No one likes love triangles. '''

'''Keefe is 100% right that the Alvar-opens-the-gate plan was long-winded, convoluted, and could have been accomplished much easier. What a great analogy for this series. '''

'''Flashback is my new least favorite book in this series. I honestly can't think of anything I liked about this book. Which is sad, because every book so far has at least had some parts I enjoyed. This book had some huge pacing problems, and that is saying something for this series. I still think overall this series is ~2.5 stars, and I would've given this book 2 stars, if only for Keefe and my other favorite side characters occasionally making a cameo, but I'm subtracting another for her not analyzing Fitz's actions. First the gnome slavery thing and now this. I don't know right now if I can stand to keep going unless she reverses the Fitzphie stuff. Not analyzing the potentially abusive tendencies of Fitz is downright dangerous. '''

What this series needs

'''I still think this series has potential to be decent, but it has increasingly focused on the worst aspects of itself over the past few books. This is what needs to happen to get this shit back on track: '''

'''---Have Sophie stop hand waving Fitz's anger issues and realize that Fitz lashing out, accusing her of taking sides, pressuring her into the match, acting extremely jealous, showing violent tendencies, etc is not healthy or normal relationship behavior. And no amount of cute boy can make it ok. This is extremely horrifying to me, seeing how often these traits are rationalized in real life. It doesn't matter that he's sweet sometimes. Manipulative behavior intermixed with sweetness is textbook abusive relationship. Please don't let this stand, please back pedal on this plot.'''

'''---Just end the horrible love triangle already. No one likes love triangles.'''

---Let all the wonderful side characters have character development and let them talk about things other than the love triangle or the Neverseen.

'''---Pick up the pacing A LOT. Start solving mysteries, have our heroes accomplish something, stop reversing deaths. We are 7 books in. It's time to build to the finale.'''

'''---Stop shuffling the villains and tell us what the Neverseen's goals are. PLEASE.'''

'''---Decide on your message and stick to it. Is the message prejudice is bad? Then make sending this message a priority.'''

'''Can this series still be salvaged? I don't know. But I'm not super hopeful right now.'''